Question:
"PURR"-LITICAL CORRECTNESS
--My cat does not barf hairballs, he is a floor/rug redecorator.
--My cat does not break things, she helps gravity do its job.
--My cat does not fear dogs, they are merely sprint practice tools.
--My cat does not gobble, she eats with alacrity.
--My cat does not scratch, he is a furniture/rug/skin ventilator.
--My cat does not yowl, he is singing off-key.
--My cat is not a "shedding machine", she is a hair relocation stylist.
--My cat is not a "treat-seeking missile," she enjoys the proximity of food.
--My cat is not a bed hog, he is a mattress appreciator.
--My cat is not a chatterbox, she is advising me on what to do next.
--My cat is not a dope addict, she is catnip appreciative
--My cat is not a lap fungus, he is bed selective.
--My cat is not a pest, she is attention deprived.
--My cat is not a ruthless hunter, she is a wildlife control expert.
--My cat is not evil, she is badness enhanced.
--My cat is not fat, he is mass enhanced.
--My cat is not hydrophobic, she has an inability to appreciate moisture.
--My cat is not lazy,he is motivationally challenged.
--My cat is not underfoot, she is shepherding me to my next destination (the food dish).


Answer:
My cat is not evil, she is badness enhanced
My cat is not lazy,he is motivationally challenged
I love them all but those two are the best!


Answer: